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I apologize stars ..

but I'll be off a bit! I will explain later ..!

love you ..!!!

I miss you so much ...!!

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day today .. nothing short of horrible ...

more blood .. blood and blood ...

blood from the nose, mouth and ears ..

eyes red and swollen ..

The white hands ..

the thing that I immediately thought was "I'm going to die"

I was taken to the hospital my teacher of photography and the response from doctors was ...

"it's nothing serious .. by the analysis is not nothing wrong .."

What's even more strange is that after this strange thing happens I'm fine, I acknowledge only a bit of tiredness in the legs ..

Girls I got really scared ..

I would love to have you here!

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fainting!

few words ...

immense joy ... and then a scream: " help "

and then nothing ...

I have no idea what happened ...

I just know that before I was smiling at my mother ..!

I found myself on the bed with a drip attached to the arm

and my brother lying next to me with his hand in mine ...

and my mother at the foot of the bed with my cell phone in one hand and in the clothes full of blood ..!

I'm fine ..! I do not remember, do not understand,

not speak .. just look at me ..!

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Ohiohi ...

Exhausted ...

is since last night arguing with my boyfriend ... but not what is bothering me, other times I was shaking in anticipation of its response to the fear that he would tell me that between us was over .. Now if he wants to continue this story, things SHOULD NEVER CHANGE ... and I am more convinced than before ... I told him that I I be happy, I want to be happy with him , but if I have to suffer to be with him, feel bad, be nervous, then do I do with anything ..

- from 4e30 to 5e30 Today I was running on the river .. I do advantage for the nice day, usually, you know, do the exercise bike in my room, but I want to escape , go somewhere that is not surrounded by 4mura .. mp3 ear, tissues and cells (for hours and emergencies) .. At first it was a tremendous effort .. my heart was pounding, the mils was about to break .. but I ran .. I wanted to run, or perhaps run away .. but still do not understand ..

- arriving home, I climb up the mountains and on the exercise bike .. and do a good half hour of pedaling fast enough .. and then nothing, finished .. Now in the shower, various creams, hair, and enamel; electric blue ...! beautiful ..! ^. ^

I feel so good right now ...!!! : D

I'm here in front of the fireplace, and I can not stop smiling, even with my boyfriend, can not find a solution ..!!!

What can I say ..! It will be the arrival of the report this morning, without even a 'failure .. Maybe because I no longer want to cry for him .. Maybe because I found a wonderful relationship with my mother .. BOH I do not know ..!

I know that today was a wonderful day!

How did you star??

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Confusion ... girls in my head ... there is only confusion

I can not speak with my boyfriend every time I try to make them understand certain things, whatever it is he replies "no reason" "You're stupid" or "lose weight hurts the brain" ...

Why?

I do not take it anymore .. really With just a boy should speak, and if anything that should not be let off steam, clarify, or just talking ... But no longer able to have dialogue ..

I see him once a week and we can never be alone .. or for one reason or another ...

Last night I had promised a nice dinner, and I made him ... A dinner made all by myself .. After dinner I think I can be alone with him, maybe watching a movie, or talking cmq .. A quiet evening, romantic .. An evening for which I had prepared everything, thinking that would be very nice .. Oh no my dear friends .. no ..! Never be ... Hear hear .. "At 22 I need to bring to town my sister and her friends" .. what ???????? not stand it anymore .. is always in the middle ... always ...!! There is no way .. All times sacrosanct ask him to go out dancing, or to go for a ride, I check on her like a mushroom and I am "then? Saturday night you do? You go to dance is not it? "

" Okay ... bear alessia ...!!" my mother says, but in my head girottola the idea of \u200b\u200bit on fire ..

After I asked the cell to make a call .. "Mom, then? What time did I come to take?" Eh eh ... no what the fuck ... daiii but ... NO NO NO ... I do not believe ...

I wonder and I say .. but Why?? But still .... viaa that anger ...

black girls really are in crisis ... I know it sounds like a shit .. But for me it is not ..

not be able to talk to another boy, all is known and not for a month and with his boy with whom he has two years .. no!

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news

Amiche .. I have some news and I want to share with you .. I hope you will please ...

I met a guy a few weeks ago, one evening when I went dancing with a friend of mine and a group of his friends and friends .. is very nice and polite cute .. We've talked a lot and I enjoyed myself to death with him on my birthday .. Well yes, including raffles and refined and we exchanged numbers, cmq because we knew that we would see in other nights, because if I go out with my friend (the one I organized a surprise party) he will be present, and because he is a boy latecomer number I will be very useful to track ... We felt and said that the conclusion was very pleased to have known, after a long time, a girl so interesting .. (IO) and listen, listen .. he lived the exact same things that I'm going through .. and some of you ..! I talked to him, not in detail, of ANA and he got the fly .. He too was in search of perfection like me and some friends have turned their backs, when I needed it most! One of us is feeling .. We talk really well .. and are already two or three days that I think about this thing ... Here everything ok right? It 's a beautiful thing ... were it not that I am engaged .. LOVE MY BOY .. this is clear, but with this guy, M. When we speak as if talking to myself .. and on this, I am very confused ..! OO


Another novelty is that weight 55kg, and my IBM 18 ... You have no idea what this might mean? What could it mean for me?? There the 'm doing .. my efforts, my cries, my fight, my loneliness, my anger has served to .. something, as my determination .. I do not know if it is on my own or of ANA determination .. I do not know .. but there are success! My goal was to get from 70 to 60kg, and reached 60, I wanted to challenge myself and get to 55 .. Now I know I can do and get what I want .. and for this I do not stop here .. no no .. ehehe .. 50kg ..! 50? where sieteee?? I'm arrivandooo! >. \u0026lt;


why .. today, remained in town to go the beautician, I went in front of a flower shop and I immediately thought of buying a rose for my mom .. thank you for the patience and love that showed me this month and a half .. Did I date and when his smile has filled my heart with joy ..! She fills my heart with joy ..!

Girls so I hope that you today went well,

that everything is fine .. as you want and as you deserve ..

I apologize to all if not almost never comment,

but the words are not good,

and absolutely do not want to say things for granted

or useless or even meaningless ..

But know that your every post I read

and are close to you for better or for worse!

KISS MY ANGELS!

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help O O. .......

This thing is not fasting, is proving so difficult ...

The guilt is terrible, is destroying me ..

although I have only eaten bag of salad with meza 4o5 small tomatoes, seasoned with balsamic vinegar, unfortunately, for lack of regular vinegar and lemon -.- "

BAH

no more words!

"You can do it,

but you can not go it alone"

help

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I'm back here to write a very short post ..

never a fast the ..

not want them to starve and binge and feel bad after I had thrown up the soul ..

Now I have found my relationship with my mother and did not want to ruin everything .. again ..

will eat little but eat at least a salad or something light cmq .. and if not I am hungry I shall see that the broth .. because her smile is beautiful ..!

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exceptional evening ...

Last night a friend of mine came to me to take .. "Better prepared, you will leave .."
I -> "But where do I go with cold ?????"
her -> "Muovitiiii strength ... .. we are waiting"
I prepare to travel and go ..
arrived in front of a disco, I see some of my friends and my friends ..
BELLOOOOO THAT ... I have done a wonderful surprise ..
in the grip of euphoria and hug all we get .. I was on overload ...
I had reserved a table, drinks and cake ... who loves !
An evening to say the least wonderful ...!! I enjoyed very much .. and the sweet was delicious ..
(well I was with orange juice for breakfast only .. but basically it was my party right? Me is precisely because she enjoyed it .. also the fruit ^. ^)
is true .. I'm not alone ...!!! :) A magnificent evening ..! The only thing is
was the lack of my boyfriend .. but he was also one of the organizers of everything .. and this has made me even more happy ...!! I returned home at 5 .. I stopped after having my friend her boyfriend and his friend to breakfast .. 0.0
"no thanks, I do not want anything"
them -> "by eating a piece of something that for sure .. do not do anything"
I give up and take a piece of apple cake with jam, but I have not thought of calories or fat and stuff .. I was really happy ..!
I woke up this morning at 9 and 30 to help my mother to cook because people came to lunch .. * Fish *.. I weigh myself just got out of bed .. --.. mh well I'm falling slowly recovered order by order the weight I had left ..--
Mom -> "love eat today? Fish .. it is light stuff" I
-> "you mama but what I want"
and today for lunch I ate three voulevant, a bit of pasta with salmon, and two slices of sweet yogurt ..
Siiiii .. I know I know .. I ate too ... I am Conscious .. but I wanted to make happy my mom ..
because I realized that I love her ..!

a kiss goodies ..!